I was standing at the checkout at Sainsbury's on my lunch break today, with my basketful of shopping all laid out on the conveyor belt when, out of the blue, a grey-haired old man steps in front of me and places four tins of soup in front of my groceries.

I stand agog, utterly speechless.

He then has the audacity to turn round and say to me:

"I'm sorry, have I just skipped in front of you?"

"Yes, I believe you have."  I reply dryly.

"Well, I'm sorry but I didn't see you."

"I can't understand why you didn't see me.  I've been standing here all along, with all my shopping laid out on the belt."  I respond.

"Aw c'mon!" he retorts, "Do you really think I would be so ignorant as to just barge in front?"

"Meh!" I shrug, biting my tongue and sooooooo wanting to say this:

"Yes, you bl**dy well DID barge in front of me, you ignorant old git!  If you didn't see me then I suggest you need an eye test, Mister!  I've been standing here for five minutes with a helluva lot more shopping than your poxy tins!  If you really couldn't wait in the queue, then you should've used the Self-Serve checkouts.  Why are you out shopping at lunchtime anyway?  You have ALL DAY to shop, whereas I am on my LUNCH BREAK from work!  Didn't see me, my @rse!  Should've gone to Specsavers!  Moron!"

If you would like to vent your spleen and launch a tirade of abuse at a deserving party, then hop over to Hiding From The Kids to take part in the What I Meant To Say Wednesday meme.