This is my second week taking part in the fun meme at Supah Mommy called Post-It Note Tuesday.

This week, I take my inspiration from Michelle of Blissful Babble who wrote a great blog post last week re disrespect, which you can read HERE.

Yes, this week I’ve had it with rude people.  I’m just saying!  ;P

Right, that’s me got all that off my chest, and it was FUN!!

If you’d like to join in the fun then please visit Supah Mommy’s blog for more info.

Another week, another Mamma Guilt Monday, courtesy of Cop Mama.

I’m taking my girls to see the X Factor Live in Glasgow this evening.  (For my Non-UK readers, X Factor is a TV program akin to American Idol.  In fact, Mr Compliments (AKA Simon Cowell) is giving up his spot on American Idol to take X Factor to the USA.)  This will be the girls’ first pop concert, and I am hoping that they are not too young to enjoy it!  (They are only 5 1/2 years old!  *blushes*)

When they started watching the program last year, they enjoyed watching the auditions, and we all had great fun giving the contestants thumbs up or thumbs down.  When the live shows started they enjoyed the singing and dancing, and soon picked out some favourites:

Jamie (Afro) Archer,

Stacey Solomon,

and…… last but not least, John and Edward (AKA Jedward).

The first bit of Mamma Guilt relating to the X Factor is that the girls were distraught and cried buckets when Jamie got voted out.  I felt awful.  I berated myself for letting them watch, telling myself that they were too young!  But the thing is, they did enjoy watching the shows and rooting for their favourites – especially John and Edward (who I personally detested!!) 

These feelings of guilt returned when, a few weeks later, their ultimate favourites, John and Edward were voted off the show.  I had already purchased the tickets for the X Factor Tour, and they were supposed to be a Christmas present.  However, I ended up having to tell them about it early, just to calm them down. 

I had yet more feelings of Mamma Guilt last week, when I realised I had left it too late to organise some unique personalised t-shirts for the girls to wear at the concert.  (January is such a bad month moneywise, and the beginning of March always catches me by surprise, with February being a short month!)

I’m sure I’ll experience yet more Mamma Guilt tomorrow morning, when the girls struggle to get out of bed for school, after their late night out!  (Still, it is only a one-off, I suppose!)

What about you? What mama guilt would you like to share on Mama Guilt Monday? Whether it’s funny or serious, blog about it today and then come back here to enter your post link into the MckLinky.

If you don’t have a blog, or would rather not take part in the MckLinky, please feel free to share your mama guilt in the Comments below.

If you’re visiting here, as part of the MckLiny blog hop, please leave a comment to let me know you were here.

Please click here to enter the Mama Guilt Monday MckLinky on Cop Mama’s website.

Please call by on Wednesday for some X Factor fun on Wordless Wednesday!…

Thanks for stopping by!

 A Future of Choices

In celebration of International Women’s Day, I thought I’d write about my hopes and aspirations for my twin daughters’ future, while reflecting on my own life and that of my mother.

 At just five years old, my daughters are growing up in a world different to that of my childhood, and significantly different to that of my own mother’s childhood.  They are growing up in a fast-paced world of technology, with computers and gadgets controlling almost every aspect of our lives.  They are growing up in a world of consumerism, where we have a multitude of choices for food, clothing, household goods, toys, gadgets, and luxury items.  It is a throw-away culture, with people opting to replace items that are still in working order, just so they can upgrade to the latest model or keep up with fashion.  It is a world of celebrity, with reality stars and WAGS, who are famous without having any discernable talent. It is a world of terrorism, where travel is an ever-increasing risk.

I want my girls to enjoy their school days, and will encourage them to progress to further or higher education.  As an advocate of lifelong learning, I am teaching my girls that education is an important privilege.  They should take advantage of the educational resources available to them, because there are many girls in other countries who cannot access even the most basic education.  I firmly believe that education is never wasted.  Therefore, if they change their mind halfway through their studies, or go on to do something completely different after graduating, their time spent learning will still be a positive contribution to their lives.

My own mother reluctantly left school at fifteen to start a job.  A talented artist, she really wanted to go to Glasgow School of Art.  Unfortunately, this wasn’t an option for her.  She was expected to start earning and contribute to the household.  Although she had been a good scholar at school, my mother was never encouraged to pursue her education, simply because she was a girl.  She had no choice.  This was in 1960.  Her brother, a few years younger, went on to study at university.

My parents always offered support and encouragement to my sister and I, throughout our educational years.  I hope to offer the same level of encouragement to my daughters.  I will support them with their educational choices, such as choosing their subjects for third year, choosing which course to study after school, and what college or university to go to. 

UK legislation and EU Regulations have encouraged equality in the workplace, and I hope that, whatever career path my daughters take, they will be able to progress through the ranks as far as they want.  I hope that they can work in a family friendly environment, just as I do.

I work in local government, which has family friendly policies such as flexible working hours, condensed working weeks, voluntary reduced hours and career breaks.  Public Sector unions fought long and hard throughout the 1980s to achieve these policies, so that women could hold down a job, and still carry out their family obligations.  The policies are for all staff, male and female, meaning fathers can take a more hands-on approach to family matters such as childcare and looking after sick or elderly relatives.  I would like to see more private firms adopt these family friendly policies in the future.  Therefore, no matter what career path my girls choose, they will have a better chance of achieving a work / life balance.

If family friendly working practices are adopted by the majority of companies in the future, it will mean that my daughters should be able to share family responsibilities with their partner.  As it stands just now, it tends to be women who give up their jobs or reduce their hours to look after their children or elderly and sick relatives, with the man being the main breadwinner.  The balance is slowly changing, with many women now earning more than their partner.  In such instances, it may be preferable for the man to reduce his hours or give up his job to look after the house and family.  I see this trend rising in the future.

When my mother was pregnant with me, she gave up her job, as was the normal practice of the 1970s.  She did not return to work until my sister started school, more than ten years later.  In those days, common opinion was that “the woman’s place was in the home.”  She had no choice.

When I had my twin daughters, I was in the fortunate position to be able to take a year off work.  I had six months paid maternity leave, and six months unpaid, followed by two months of backdated annual leave and public holiday entitlement.  I appreciate that not everyone is able to take that length of time off work after having a baby.  I thoroughly enjoyed my time off work with my babies.

I returned to work on a part-time basis, three days per week, with my wonderful in-laws watching my precious daughters while I was working.  Now my daughters are at school and I am back working fulltime, but I’m fortunate that my job is right on my doorstep and I work flexible hours.

When it comes to relationships, I hope that my daughters will find that special someone to settle down with.  My parents have been happily married for over forty years, as have my in-laws.  I have been with my husband for nineteen years, married for almost twelve of them.  Therefore, it would be lovely for my daughters to follow our example. 

I hope that they will get married, but will support their decision if they choose not to.  I hope that they will have a partnership of equals, and never be trapped by domestic abuse or emotional blackmail.  Unfortunately, there are still too many women suffering in these types of relationships and marriages.

In womanhood, my daughters will have access to a much wider choice of contraception than in my mother’s day, or indeed what was widely available to me in the 1990s.  The Mirena, implants, patches and contraceptive injections are widely available now.  The “morning after pill” is also widely available over-the-counter in the UK.  All that was on offer to me, and my mother before me, was the pill, condoms or an IUD (coil).  Indeed, the male pill or contraceptive injection is currently being tested, which will address the bias towards “female contraception”.

I hope that one day, my beautiful daughters will have beautiful children of their own.  However, if they choose not to, I will support them in this decision.

In a way, they are lucky to be growing up in an age, where many advances in fertility treatment have been made or are in the process of development.  It is now possible to delay motherhood, with the help of IVF and other fertility treatments.  Women can now freeze eggs and embryos before undergoing chemotherapy.  Also, many women are becoming mothers with the help of egg donors, sperm donors and surrogates.

Unfortunately, other recent trends have been a rise in teenage pregnancies and abortions.  Obviously this is not something I would want my daughters to experience.  However, if the worst happened, I would certainly be there to help them with their difficult choices, and support them in their decisions.  I hope that I will be an approachable mother to my girls, as they grown up, and that I will be able to have frank discussions with them about sex, relationships, contraception, etc. 

Thankfully, we are no longer living in an age when pregnant schoolgirls and unmarried mothers are shipped off to institutions to have their babies, before being forced to give their children up for adoption.

However, unfortunately we are in an age where abortion is commonplace in women of all ages.  I do not want to debate the arguments for and against this procedure.  All I can say is that I wish that the women of the future will take time to be more responsible in their family planning choices.  I believe that there is so much choice of contraception available to women, that abortions and morning after pills should only be used on rare occasions.

I think the biggest piece of advice I will try to convey to my girls as they grow up, will be that they should not try to “have it all”, as the women of my generation were lead to believe.  I do hope that “it all” will be available and accessible to them, but I will tell them that they must make choices in life in order to lead a happy, healthy, balanced life. 

Yes, they can have a high-flying career if they wish, but they will have to sacrifice their leisure time and family time.   They will have to consider postponing or discounting motherhood.

Yes, they can decide to devote their life (for a while anyway) to raising a family, but that does not mean that they cannot work too.  They can choose to work part-time or from home.

I just want my daughters to be grateful for the choices that they have.  They have these choices because women of the past fought to make changes in legislation, working practices and in the culture and ethos of our country and communities.

I hope that in the future, more women from all over the world will have similar choices available to them.  Sadly, today there are still too many girls denied an education, denied a career and denied a voice in society.

I have written this post for Bloggers Unite for International Women’s Day (IWD).  International Women’s Day is a major day of global celebration for the economic, political and social achievements of women past, present and future.  There are events all over the UK and throughout the world to celebrate IWD on March 8^th 2010.  You can find out more by visiting:  http://www.internationalwomensday.com

Apologies to anyone who stopped by yesterday when I was experiencing some technical difficulties on my site. I think (hope!!) these problems have now been resolved.

This is my second week on the Five Question Friday courtesy of Mama M. I thoroughly enjoyed taking part last week and, if you’ve never participated, I recommend you do! Not only is it fun, but you might also gain a few more followers and some “Comment Luv” in return.

Questions for Friday, March 5th: (Thanks to Courtney, Erin, Renee, Thorney London, and Sandy for their question suggestions!

1. What’s your guilty pleasure?

In my life B.C. (Before Children), I used to enjoy luxuriating in the bath with aromatherapy oils, candles and relaxing music.  However, in my life A.C. I seldom get to use the bath.  The bathroom is the kid’s domain, while Hubby and I have an Ensuite Shower Room.  I’m lucky if I get to soak in the bath more than twice a year now!  LOL

My guilty pleasure nowadays is an occasional lie in on the weekend, if Hubby is off work and feeling particularly generous!  LOL    I like to watch Saturday Kitchen or read the papers, with a cup of tea and some toast.  I’ll then head for the shower around 11 o’clock. 

2. What is your favorite TV series?

At the moment it is Lost.  However, I’m waaaaay behind, as I’ve just started watching Series Three on DVD.  I always knew I’d LOVE Lost, but unfortunately, it came first out when my twin girls were just babies and getting to watch just five minutes of uninterrupted TV was a rare luxury!  Therefore, I resigned myself to buying the boxset when it came out.  I did buy the box set, but only got round to watching it last year!  Once I started watching it, I was hooked. 

3. Can you speak any foreign languages?

Yes, I can speak French, which I studied to Higher level at school.  I can also speak a teenie tiny little bit of Spanish. 

4. How many pairs of shoes do you own?

Hmmmmm…  Let me see…. I think it’s about 18-20.  I LOVE shoes and, finances permitting, I would have a lot more.  A girl can NEVER have enough shoes!

5. What’s your favorite kind of M&M’s…peanut, almond, straight up regular, etc.?

I haven’t eaten M&Ms in years, but I only like the regular ones.  M&Ms bring back memories of my teenage years, when I used to have a paper round.  I normally had a packet of M&Ms or Skittles in my pocket to keep me going on my round! 

Rules: Copy and paste the following questions to your blog post, answer them, then c’mon back and link up! If you’d like, grab the code for the blog hop…but you don’t have to!

If you don’t have a blog, but want to join in the fun…feel free to post your answers in the comments of any of the blogs along the way!

It’s a fun, easy post and it’s all about YOU!

Apologies to anyone who stopped by yesterday when I was experiencing some technical difficulties on my site.  I think (hope!!) these problems have now been resolved.

Yay!  It's Friday, and that means it's time for the Friday Follow! I'd like to welcome back all my current MammaKerr followers, and give a big warm welcome to all new visitors to the MammaKerr blog.  I hope you like what you see and decide to follow me.  It would also be great if you would leave a comment below to say "Hi!"

I'm at home with a sick child today.  One of my twins has a very upset stomach.  The poor wee soul was sick all over herself in bed last night!  After stripping, washing and changing her, I had to do the same to her bed.  Then a while later she was up again, and had been sick down her front again.  (Thankfully, I did not have to change her bed this time!) 

She's been sick a couple of times since getting up this morning, but there's not much left in her stomach to throw up.

I had to send her twin sister up to school with my neighbout friend, who has a daughter in the same year.  The girls were a bit upset at being split up today.  Bless!

Anyway, I'm just glad to be able to take time off work to be with my little daughter.

Now, it's time for the follow...

The Friday Follow celebration is hosted by One 2 Try, Hearts Make Families and Midday Escapades! Join us every Friday to get more blog followers and to follow other interesting blogs. It is all about sharing and having fun.




Here’s how YOU can join the celebration:

–Link up your blog name and URL using the MckLinky below. Only need to add on one blog to be seen on all the blog hops.

–Follow the Friday Follow hostesses listed in the first 3 slots.

–Follow as many blogs as you’d like.

–Take a moment to comment on the blogs telling them you’re from Friday Follow.

–Follow back when you get a new follower through Friday Follow.

The Blog Hop is the same at each of our three hosts blogs so you do not have to add your blog at each site. Just one – but you can follow each blog. Follow a few or follow them all.

The list is new each week. The links do not carry over. Please link up each week for new participants to find your blogs. The list is only open to add your blog links on Fridays. It will be visible all week to visit the blogs listed.

It’s Thankful Thursday!

Today I want to tell you how thankful I am to have great neighbours. I live in a lovely quiet cul-de-sac with great neighbours around me. One of my next-door neighbours happens also to be one of my BFFs, and her children are great friends with my children.

We moved into our house almost five years ago, when it was just built, and it immediately felt like home. With our neighbours all moving into their homes around the same time, we immediately gelled together as a little community. Some of the original neighbours have since moved on, including my next-door neighbours on the other side. However, I am happy to say that I have two lovely families on either side of me.

We are quite a social bunch, and invite the neighbours to parties, BBQs, etc. Whenever, I have a gathering at my house, my friends and family always remark on how lucky I am to have such lovely neighbours.

I appreciate my neighbours all the more because, I have experienced the alternative first-hand. Before we moved to our current home, we lived in a mid-terraced house, and one of our neighbours was an absolute nightmare. He would have his TV on loud or play his music full blast at all hours. He had noisy parties frequently (at least once or twice per week), with lots of loud music, shouting, stomping, banging doors into the early hours of the morning. If we complained we just got abuse and people would start banging on our walls. It was horrendous! He would turn up on our doorstep blind drunk and start ranting and raving at us, then put a grovelling apology letter through our door the next day. His antisocial behaviour always seemed to be worse when my husband was working away, and I often stat in bed crying with frustration because I couldn’t get to sleep and had to get up at 6am for work the next day. We had to put up with this behaviour for years!

Therefore, you can see why I am sooooo grateful for the lovely neighbours I have today. We look out for one another. We keep an eye on each other’s properties, kids, pets, cars, etc… We are respectful to each other. We care about each other.

What are you thankful for today? Please feel free to leave me a comment or (if you have a blog of your own) please join the MckLinky below.

I’ve just come across a fun meme at Supah Mommy called Post-It Note Tuesday.

Today, I’m posting some notes on an Internet theme:

Right, that’s me got all that off my chest, and it was FUN!!

If you’d like to join in the fun then please visit Supah Mommy’s blog for more info.

This week’s MckLinky theme is to share a favourite recipe. I thought I’d share one of my favourite dishes with you. It’s Pasta Al ‘Arrabiata with a morish meaty twist! I love adding smoked sausages to a hot and spicy Arrabiata sauce. You can use whatever pasta takes your fancy. I like to use fusilli or penne.

Mamma’s Meaty Arrabiata Pasta
Serves 4

Add the olive oil to a large frying pan and shallow fry the onion and garlic.
Add the red pepper and chilli and simmer until the onions are golden.
Add the smoked sausage and stir continuously for 1 minute
Add the chopped tomatoes and bring to the boil
Meanwhile, cook your pasta according to the packet instructions
Add the olives to the pan to warm through
Drain the pasta (do not rinse it) and add it to the sauce in the pan
Toss the pasta in the sauce to coat it for 30 seconds
Transfer to individual pasta plates.
Top with fresh basil leaves, salt and black pepper to taste and optional grated parmesan cheese.




Another week, another Mamma Guilt Monday.

Today, Mamma Kerr is eating humble pie.

Yesterday, I turned the house upside down looking for my daughter’s shoe. The girls were getting ready to go to a Birthday Party and they needed to put on their shoes. My heart sank when I realised that there were just three shiny black shoes lying in the corner of the livingroom.

On closer inspection, I found that we had 2 size 9’s and only one size 8, so it was Rachel’s shoe that was missing. (Yes, my twin girls have different sized feet!)

“Where did you leave your shoe?”

“I don’t know.”

“Where did you take it off?”

“Here!” she says, pointing to our two-seater couch.

I immediately look under the cushions on the couch and feel inbetween the seats and under the arms. No sign of the shoe. I then pull the mechanism for the recliner seats at both sides. I found a wide-toothed comb, an assortment of bobbles and clasps, and one of the twins’ artistic masterpieces, but no shoe.

I pulled the couch out away from the wall. No shoe behind the couch. I looked in my open handbag which was lying beside the couch. No shoe in there.

I then examined the other couch, even though I was pretty certain it could not be there.

Flashback to the previous night:

My Hubby has been working seven days a week for the past month or so. Therefore he has been pretty tired when he gets home. On Saturday night, he had fallen asleep on the couch soon after eating his dinner. He was still lying there fast asleep, stretched along the length of the three-seater, under a blanket, when the girls returned from Granny & Grandpa’s house.

The girls got dressed for bed in the livingroom, beside Granny and I, who were sitting on the smaller couch. Therefore, the shoe would not have been on that couch.

Still, I thought I’d better be thorough in my search so I checked under the cushions, between the seats, under the arms, underneath (by opening the recliner mechanisms) and pulled the couch away from the wall. There was still no sign of the shoe.

“Where is your shoe? We need to find it. Help Mummy look for it!”

The girls searched under the coffee table behind the curtains, under the TV stand, in their toybox and even in their dolls house. (Yes, we have a dolls house in our livingroom!) No sign of the shoe.

I was flummoxed! Where could the shoe have gone? It can’t just have disappeared into thin air!

I went into the kitchen and checked the laundry basket, where I’d put the girls’ clothes they’d had on the day before. No sign of the shoe. I even checked inside the washing machine and tumble dryer. No shoe to be found. Getting desperate, I even checked inside the kitchen bin and the recycle bin. Still, no shoe.

Where could it be?

I checked the girls’ coats they had been wearing the night before. Could the shoe have somehow slipped down one of their sleeves? Sadly, no.

Suddenly, I had a brainwave. Granny must have it! Granny had her bag open when she had been sitting on the couch. She had been showing me some photos, and I had given her some money towards our London trip. I remembered how she had been looking for her car keys before she left the house, and that we had upturned the cushions, only to find them on the table. (Yes, there seems to be a genetic trait here! LOL) Anyway, it was conceivable that the stray shoe may have inadvertently gotten into her bag, so I texted Granny and asked her, realising she would not be back from church yet.

The girls’ friend from nextdoor then arrived wearing a magnificent pair of sparkly party shoes. My girls stared in awe.

“Oooooooh!! Look at Megan’s sparkly high heels!” (Yes, her shoes had an enviable-sized heel on them.)

Here was their friend with her fancy party shoes on, and my daughters only had three shoes between them! (Not that they ONLY have one pair of shoes each, of course, but they only have one pair of black shoes that went with their outfit.)

In desperation, I brought down a favourite pair of sandals from the summer – the Minnie Mouse ones (because they have red spots and a bow) – and I prayed that they would still fit her. She squeezed her feet into them, determined that they would fit. It pains me to say it, but they did look a tad tight, but she announced:

“They’re fine!”

So, we all march round the corner (not very far at all, thankfully) to their friend’s house for the party.

Having left the girls at the party, I returned to the house for one last search for the missing shoe. I checked the dining room, under the table, under the sideboard, behind the curtains, but there was still no sign of the shoe.

Mum had now texted me back. Unfortunately, she did not have the shoe.

“AAAaaaaargh!!! Where is it?!?!?”

Fast forward now to late last night, when tired Hubby had again fallen asleep on the couch. I went to the hall cupboard to get a blanket to lay over him. I flick out the blanket to cover him but….

…. wait, what’s this? A black shiny shoe is attached to the blanket via the velcro strap. Mystery solved. I obviously hadn’t noticed it, when lifting the folded blanket to put it back in the cupboard on Sunday morning, and I hadn’t even thought about double-checking the blanket when I realised the shoe was missing. D’oh!

So you see, today I’m feeling a little Mamma Guilt because I had my girls searching high and low with me, for a missing shoe, and got all stressed out, spoiling the fun of their pre-party anticipation. I also feel guilty about sending my daughter to the party in a pair of shoes that I suspect to be a little ‘neat’ on her.

I also felt guilty, typing up this post, realising that I’d left my poor tired Hubby asleep on the couch two nights running! (Well, at least I’d covered him with a blanket! LOL)

What about you? What mama guilt would you like to share on Mama Guilt Monday? Whether it’s funny or serious, blog about it today and then come back here to enter your post link into the MckLinky.

If you don’t have a blog, or would rather not take part in the MckLinky, please feel free to share your mama guilt in the Comments below.

If you’re visiting here, as part of the MckLiny blog hop, please leave a comment to let me know you were here.

Please click here to enter the Mama Guilt Monday MckLinky on Cop Mama’s website.

Thanks for stopping by!